Comments on: Dealing with Manipulation, Guilt, and Self-Pity http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-manipulation-guilt-and-self-pity Humanity and Science Behind Depression, Bipolar Disorder, and Mental Health - by Jane Chin PhD Sat, 05 Jul 2008 21:27:41 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5.1 By: Week 19 - From Separation to Surrender to Reunion : WHAT I LOVE TO DO http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-manipulation-guilt-and-self-pity#comment-72200 Week 19 - From Separation to Surrender to Reunion : WHAT I LOVE TO DO Mon, 09 Jun 2008 05:30:04 +0000 http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-manipulation-guilt-and-self-pity/#comment-72200 [...] a reader of my mental health website (chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage), who had read an article on dealing with emotional manipulation and parental-inflicted guilt that I’d written. The reader was so comforted by it that she said she would print it out to [...] [...] a reader of my mental health website (chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage), who had read an article on dealing with emotional manipulation and parental-inflicted guilt that I’d written. The reader was so comforted by it that she said she would print it out to [...]

]]> By: Jane Chin, Ph.D. http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-manipulation-guilt-and-self-pity#comment-68966 Jane Chin, Ph.D. Mon, 07 Apr 2008 05:15:39 +0000 http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-manipulation-guilt-and-self-pity/#comment-68966 Hi Jenifer, Isn't it amazing that the moment we no longer needed someone's approval, we seem to garner it more readily than when we go out of our way to desperately gain it! I understand where you are coming from, as my personal experience has been similar. When I was young, my father gave me attention as I shown a liking to study, and he was a scholarly type. It was obvious that my mother felt left out as well as developed an inferiority complex, and as I was growing up, she accused me of acting superior and arrogant and looking down on her. I am now more awakened to the love she was probably deprived of all of her life, and therefore, the insecurity was very strong and this led to a sense of competition when there is truly none. Of course I was oblivious to this growing up, and it made me a basketcase. Hi Jenifer,

Isn’t it amazing that the moment we no longer needed someone’s approval, we seem to garner it more readily than when we go out of our way to desperately gain it!

I understand where you are coming from, as my personal experience has been similar. When I was young, my father gave me attention as I shown a liking to study, and he was a scholarly type. It was obvious that my mother felt left out as well as developed an inferiority complex, and as I was growing up, she accused me of acting superior and arrogant and looking down on her.

I am now more awakened to the love she was probably deprived of all of her life, and therefore, the insecurity was very strong and this led to a sense of competition when there is truly none. Of course I was oblivious to this growing up, and it made me a basketcase.

]]> By: jenifer http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-manipulation-guilt-and-self-pity#comment-68965 jenifer Mon, 07 Apr 2008 02:54:46 +0000 http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-manipulation-guilt-and-self-pity/#comment-68965 Hi Jane, I like your article, my mother raised me the same way, I could never be enough for her, and it dawned on me one day that she probably resented me for some unknown reason, I just did not know for what. But when confronted, she admitted that since the day I was born, she did resent me because I recieved attention from my father, and she no longer recieved 100% attention. And now I still try to have a relationship with her, but I know I don't have to have her approval to accept myself today. What a spiritual awakening! Hi Jane,

I like your article, my mother raised me the same way, I could never be enough for her, and it dawned on me one day that she probably resented me for some unknown reason, I just did not know for what. But when confronted, she admitted that since the day I was born, she did resent me because I recieved attention from my father, and she no longer recieved 100% attention. And now I still try to have a relationship with her, but I know I don’t have to have her approval to accept myself today. What a spiritual awakening!

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